Darling Clandestine: Summer 2015 Review

Hey friends!

How’s it going? I finally got around to reviewing my massive Bitsy Haul from Darling Clandestine’s Summer release. And my. What a collection. There are eleven different perfumes here and they range from super fruity summer fun to salty pirate to road trip and everything in between. It was definitely a blast trying these all out.

So check it out!

darlingclandestine summer 2015 review

Informational Stuff: Darling Clandestine is an indie perfume shop owned by Evonne, and run on Etsy. Her reputation is one for whimsy and sharks, and her perfumes tend to reflect that, some of which can lean toward the offbeat side.

For the summer release, I basically just took my wallet out and threw it at the computer screen because I wanted to try everything. I show restraint with many indies, but not Darling Clandestine, she’s my jam. Anyway, I grabbed a little bit of everything, leaning more towards the bitsy solids. I’ve found these work great for throwing in my bag when I have a fourteen hour day and need to smell good. Honestly, I kinda wish I had gotten every scent in bitsy solids, but I may have a problem. So.

At this time, only a select few of these scents are still available in Bitsy solids and vials, though there are some full sizes around on the Etsy site. I feel kinda bad reviewing products that are not still available, but maybe you’ll catch one in a Destash or maybe you are from the future and it’s 2016 and you need some reviews before you buy Summer 2016. I try to be helpful.

I ordered from the Summer Release on May 7th. At the time I believe there was a 14 day TAT, and my order was shipped on May 25th, which made my order within the TAT. Evonne also posts on Facebook quite often and is always transparent about delays, so I was not worried. My order arrived on May 30th, it usually moves quicker, but it was trapped in the Texas Flood-Ageddon, so I expected so delays.

But you guys it was worth the wait!

Darling Clandestine Summer Perfumes

Good Stuff: Because I’m reviewing 11 scents, and I’m not the most succinct person, I’m introducing 8 Words Or Less, a very brief summary of each scent, if you just want to browse through quickly. I don’t judge.

Perfume Oils: I grabbed 4 of the scents in oil form. Just on a whim. I had no method to my selection madness.

Darling Clandestine Carny Wedding Cloudswing Harpy Tilt A Whirl

Carny Wedding-Opens with butter and sugar, unfolds to a tangy, charred wood resin, ends in a puff of sweet smoke. Some love it for the sweet, some love it for the smoke.

Full disclosure: I love tobacco scents. It makes no sense, because I don’t smoke and I hate the smell of tobacco in real life, but I adore it in perfume oils. I confuse myself sometimes.

Anyways, this starts of smelling exactly like butter cream frosting. I’m imagining a giant cupcake with all of the icing. Then the buttercream note fades to the back a bit, and the smokey tobacco note takes center stage. And it’s a real tobacco scent, strong stuff, like cigarettes or someone smoking a pipe. And I loveeeee it. I debated it, but in the end I’ve decided to just stick with my Bitsy Solid of Carny Wedding rather than go full size because my workplace is not supportive of smelling like smoke. Even with buttercream frosting.

8 Words Or Less: Cupcakes and pipe tobacco. 

Birthday Cake

Photo by duron123 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Cloudswing-A tumble in the hay! Lemongrass and vanilla and resiny wood and marigolds and new-mown clover and sun. A summer favorite—especially since the lemongrass gives it the added bonus of discouraging mosquitos.

Immediately, I’m hit with a burst of brightness. It smells like sweet lemon, hay, and dew on grass in the mornings all at once. As it mellows out, the lemon scents moves to the background and I get more fresh grass and hay. And horses. I smell horses, and let me tell you, I don’t like horses. As an animal or scent. I’ve had some bad experiences with them, they are quite rude animals. So, I have some personal bias against this scent. Since “horse” is not listed in the description, I’m assuming this is the clover/marigold/wood scent combination I’m attributing to the horse factor.

That being said, this has a great throw and lasts about four hours on me. If you love grass smells or fresh morning scents, you’ll probably dig this.

8 words or Less: Fresh morning on the farm with horses. Boo.


Photo by Criminalatt courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Harpy-Sea salt and dark bay rum and lime and milk and coconut and a bit of banana. A lovely seaside scent with a bit of a bite. 

This starts off almost too strong for me, it’s intense tangy lime and salt. I also might not like DC’s salt note because Harpy reminds me vaguely of Inked, which I am not a fan of. However, after about 20 minutes, it mellows out on my skin and smells more balanced. It’s a mix of slightly salty, slightly citrus, and I swear I can smell a beach wind. That might be the coconut and banana sneaking in there. This is what I imagine a pirate would smell like, if he was eating a lot of limes and did not have scurvy. Harpy doesn’t last long on me at all, like an hour tops before it fades away. I wonder if I would have better luck with the solid, but I don’t love this scent enough to spring for one.


Picture by: Lobster20 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

8 words or Less: Drunk pirate on the open seas with limes.

Tilt-A-Whirl-Bright summer citrus and passionfruit mellowed with sage and other wonders. Juicy and fruity but not too sweet, candy for grownups. Created for the adorable Caitlin of the awesome Shiro Cosmetics!

While during the rest of the year I prefer smelling like more complex things, (I personally love smelling like something on fire, for example), I’ve found that my summer perfume profile is light, girly, and easy to wear in the ridonkulous heat around me. And Tilt-A-Whirl is so perfect in that regard.

It’s just bubbly, sweet fruity goodness. It reminds me of candy I ate as a kid, like gummy bears or Sweet Tarts, but maybe mixed with an adult sparkly beverage. It’s what I dig in the summer. I’ll save the complex spices and burny smells for when it’s less that 100 degrees, thank you very much.

The perfume oil regrettably doesn’t last long on my skin, like two hours tops, which is normal with me and fruity scents. But I may have ordered a lil’ solid Bitsy to keep in my purse with me and extend the scent. I like it that much.

8 Words Or Less: Bubbly and fruity, like Sweet Tart Sangria


Photo by: audfriday13 courtesy FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

Solid Bitsy Perfumes:

Darling Clandestine Summer Bitsy

Brasau Y Kinoua, Bitsy Solid, $4-Created for the amazing Liz Azevedo, to celebrate her family roots and mine: Fresh, green, non-Christmasy holly, pink peppercorn and old-world wonders, fused with the maile vines of Hawai’i, spiced with a tiny touch of cinnamon and sweetened with coconut and honey. It’s green and tart and languid and floral-but-not-floral and breezy and deep. This lovely makes appearances when she takes a fancy.

This smells very green and fresh to me, like leaves in the warm sun. And to be honest, that’s pretty much all I’m getting here at first. As it dries however, it becomes much softer like the scent of leaves and flowers on the wind. I don’t really know what my feelings are on this one yet, it’s not bad, but it’s just not very exciting. That being said, it dries down to a really lovely floral that I can see myself wearing.

8 Words Or Less: Warm green plants fading into soft, breezy florals.


Photo by: Moggaro12 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Electricity So Fine, Bitsy Solid, $4-A night-black canvas of artemisia absinthum and mosses and blackest tea and port wine, splashed with an electric sizzle of sparkling violets.
Goodness, this is heavy in the best way. It smells like deep, sweet booze and dark violets. The first time I tried this, I felt it was too powdery. About a week later I tried it again, and this time it was it was the perfect nighttime scent. I don’t know if that’s hormones, skin chemistry or the scent aging, (can solids do that?). Anyway, on the second wearing the boozy smell was sweet, but subtle, like a bowl of ripe berries. A lot of times booze scents go sour on me, but this actually worked. After the wine smell fades away, it’s a cool damp floral scent, like flowers at night. If you don’t like violets, you probably won’t like this, but I thought it smelled like something I’d wear out at night. (To my imagined nightlife. Let’s be real.)


Photo by: Arvind Balaraman courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

8 Word Or Less: Smooth, deep wine and cool white florals.

Homespun, Bitsy Solid, $4-Homespun is a fragrance that begins in the vein of Cloudswing, and then takes a tumble into dark woods, sprouting with lichens and morels and mint julep
I get a burst of tangy, sweetness at first, almost leaning towards citrus-y, with just a tiny bit of sweet vanilla. This doesn’t last long on me, it eventually dries down to what amounts to a pool day on me. That is to say, it smells like warm, citrusy, sunshine. I like it, but I wish it had more throw and longevity.

Picture by  sattva coutesty FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Picture by sattva coutesty FreeDigitalPhotos.net

8 Words Or Less: Bright, sweet citrus fading to light, warmth. 

La La La All Right, Bitsy Solid, $4-I built this scent on Rock’n’Roll. Sun-drenched summer breezes and road trips and cornfields and river and road. This is a very green, very earthy scent, with a similar accord to that of Fisticuffs, minus the sweetness.
When I apply this, it immediately smells comforting and warm to me. It’s slightly sweet and rich, I almost feel like I can smell warm honey or flowers on a hot breeze. After I read the scent description, my warm breeze imaginings make a lot more sense, and this really does smell like driving through a field with your windows down on a summer day. Personally, this is not the kind of scent I like in the heat of summer, but August-September, I’ll be smearing this on constantly!


Photo by: suphakit73 courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

8 Words Or Less: Road trip on a sunny day past green fields. (That was 9 words, sorry.)

Mishigami, Bitsy Solid, $4- Inspired by that greatest of lakes, Lake Michigan, my very favorite lake in the world, and all its moods and shores. Much more than an “aquatic” fragrance, this has indescribable, sandy depth. It’s been known to show up unexpectedly throughout the year.

I got this bitsy solid in one of my Spring orders as a freebie sample, so I’ve had a month or so to try it. And it still baffles me. When I test out perfumes, I like to sniff them first before reading the scent notes, and this is one of those scents that I got something completely different than the description.

To me, I swear Mishigami has Jasmine or a white floral in it. It just smells like an incredibly cool floral scent, and I’m leaning towards Jasmine because there’s that earthy depth I associate with the flower underneath the scent.  It smells feminine, clean, and fresh.

However, I don’t get anything aquatic here. Maybe like a hint of soft ocean after an hour or so of wearing it-but I could just be imagining it. I swear this is a floral scent, to the point that I’m like-did I get a mislabed Bitsy? Is this really something else? Is this what Lake Michigan smells like? Is my skin just confused? MYSTERIES.

Photo by: foto76 Courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

Photo by: foto76 Courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

8 Words Or Less: No ocean for me, just lovely florals.

Morderteile Kelah, Bitsy Solid, $4: A magnificent perfume inspired by a magnificent lady with magnificent knockers. Notes of amber, hyacinth, milk and strawberry jam. Spicy and sweet.

I ended up trying this bitsy first because when it arrived it looked like it was about to melt out of its container. For some reason, that’s just how this guy seems to be, its more a liquid gel than a solid. Despite it’s different consistency, it still works like a dream.

I thought I hated strawberry perfumes, but Moderteile Kelah has proven me wrong. This is straight up sweet, creamy strawberry. It’s my safety DC perfume, as in when I need to go to work or the in-laws, there’s no way Moderteile Kelah can offend anyone. It’s just a really pleasing strawberry jam scent, with a great throw and it lasts a long time. I mean, I guess if you hate strawberries or sweetness you won’t like this? But for me it’s all good.

Photo by Tina Phillips, courtesy FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

Photo by Tina Phillips, courtesy FreeDigitalPhotos.Net

8 Words Or Less: Delicious, sweet strawberry goodness.

Pyrotechnik- Bitsy Solid, $4-Bright, spiced cantaloupe on a bold black sky, with sweet woods and earth below. A really fascinating combination, one that does impressive wiles on the skin.
There’s a big burst of melon in the very first few seconds of this scent, but then a spicy note kicks in. It’s a really intense peppery note to me, but with a bit of a woodsy twist. All along in the background the melon is still slightly sweet and there. Sooooo I kinda hate all melons, but I thought I would give this a chance. Sadly, I still hate melons, but it was fun to try this and I’m sure I’ll find a good home for it.

Photo by:rakratchada torsap courtesy of FreeDitigalPhotos.Net

Photo by:rakratchada torsap courtesy of FreeDitigalPhotos.Net

8 Words Or Less: Melons with a bold peppery kick.

Mystery Mix!!!!- I’ve never gotten a Mystery Mix before, so I don’t know if it’s two perfumes mixed up or just notes, but dang was I giddily excited to discover this treasure in my order. And I got a full size! AND I love this scent! Yessssss.

Darling Clandestine Mystery Mix

Since this a mystery, I can only give you my general impressions which are: sexy.

This starts smelling really fresh and green to me, like wet grass after a storm. As it dries, I get a subtle smokiness. There’s something a bit dark and sophisticated about this mix to me. I can’t put my finger on what the notes are, but I think it’s overall pretty sexy. I’ve been wearing it a lot.

I should note that the first time I tried this, it started off like Cloudswing to me, kinda a burst of citrus and hay. But it hasn’t done that again. MYSTERIES.

8 Word Or Less: Fresh, wet floral and sexy smokiness. YAS.

Photo by: Evgeni Dinev courtesy of Free Digital Photos.Net

Photo by: Evgeni Dinev courtesy of Free Digital Photos.Net


Overall: So I spent an embarrassing amount of money to try all these samples, and I DO NOT REGRET IT. Each scent is unique and fun to try, even if it wasn’t my favorite. And speaking of favorites, I think I narrowed it down to these, in no particular order:

1. Tilt-A-Whirl
2. Morderteile Kelah
3. Carny Wedding
4. La La La All Right

I also really liked Electricity So Fine and Brasao Y Kinolau but I think I’ll be wearing those Top 5 the most. Really, there’s something for everyone in this collection, so you’re bound to find something you like!

Now I’m off to smell my wrists!



Questions of the Day:
-Did you grab anything from the DC Summer release?
-Did you get a Mystery Mix? I’m dying to know your thoughts?!
-Should I forgive horses for their misdeeds? I think no.


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